Last time I talked of how I had begun a spiritual journey, I had entered the Catholic Church as an adult, however at the same time I was also exploring other aspects of spirituality
At this same time my life was in turmoil, I was still living safely at home, and was struggling to break free and be part of a larger world. I was trying to figure out who I was and was drowning still living at home. I was beginning to ask questions and trying to find the answers.
I was also still dealing with the loss of my father and not coming to terms with that.
I began to realize how I had been injured in my life, by people who always said they were there to help me, whether they be family or friends, and this caused me to doubt people when they said they were my friends or would be more than this. So much of this came from my mother, who caused tremendous confusion in how I dealt with people.
The confusion caused by the abuse I was coming to realize was expressed brilliantly by PRINCE, and it was this song that expressed the confusion I was feeling internally and when it came to try and develop any relationships.
The person who had introduced me to my spirit quest was someone who was 13 years older than I and I thought I was deeply in love with her, as much as any 20 something young man can feel. I was confused by emotions that were coming to the surface, because I had not really dated anyone before so I had no experience. I also didn't know if I could trust her because of the abuse I was realizing had been part of my life
I needed to leave Colorado, and find a new beginning. So I packed a few items and took off from Stapleton International Airport. There was no looking back, only forward.
Where did I end up, what happened next, and did I break out of the cycle of addiction? Tune into my next chapter.